what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing, he was homeless

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Why was the baby smoking? He was locked in a hot car.

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A lion walks into a barber shop and asks for a haircut and the barber says no then the lion proceeds to kill everyone in the shop

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Why is Michael J. Fox so good at shake-a-weight? He is in shape.

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Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Yes.

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Why did the black guy get kicked out of school? Because he was poor academically.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to.

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Why was the man bad at football? - he is chad henne

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How do you know a thief has been using your computer? It's missing.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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woman's rights

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Why is it as hot as the sun? Because it is the sun

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What's green,has 4 legs and lives in a tree? A pool table

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A man walks into a bar, he begins drinking and returns home visably drunk. His family disowns him as he is a recovering alchoholic who was three months sober.

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What is more dangerous than heroine? T.J. Lane

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whats blue and can be seen in the sky? the sky.

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Knock knock Who's there? Death. Come with me.

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Q: What did the Mexican kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.

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your momma's so fat i almost didn't have sex with her.... almost.

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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Where did Susie go after an explosion? Everywhere

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Why did the blonde become a cannibal? Because she got hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops