What's worse than having amnesia? I don't remember.

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Ya know what's sad? You can only submit one dislike on this website.

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Roses are Violets, Violets are Roses, I am a dumb ass, The Hobbit.

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If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

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How many Neurons does a bug have? - - - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - - -- - - - -- - - - - - -It's true

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What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a train

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If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it does it make a sound? I don't know... Does the deaf woman locked in my basement?

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1. A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Just kidding, it got hit by a car on the way to the other side.

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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What did the apple tree say to the farmer? "Stop picking on me"

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Roses are red violets are blue my d*** is bigger than you.

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Knock Knock Whos there Who Yan Who Yan Who Chow Yan Chow

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How do you know a thief has been using your computer? It's missing.

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How did the Jew his German neighbor? Every morning the Jew says hello and the German replys hello

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He didnt.

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911 joke ? now thats just plane rude.

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How do you stop a baby from falling into a manhole? You catch it, and then call the appropriate services and inform them of the dangerous open manhole.

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She is so fast We call her Email Instead of Emily...

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What do you call a guy who answers your door Whatever his name his

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Q: what do you call a bunch of dead accountants? A: the holacost.

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What's the difference between Izzy and a hobo? Nothing...they both have no job and no friends

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stevie wonder watched a movie yesterday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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