Mirror mirror on the wall. Why can't I see?

Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? The two ships suffered major damageand sank, killing over 100 people. The families of the passengers mourned their loss.

Ring Around The rosy, Pockets full of posey, Just kidding they are roofies and i'm going to rape you

Why did the fat lady poop on my knee? Because i'm thirsty.

How do you kill an Asian? Poke him with a large fork until hes dead.

roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS now so do you.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

What battle did Napoleon die in? His last one.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple finding half a worm in your apple.

So a chef, a soldier, and a lawyer are riding in a plane. The pilot has a heart attack and they all die.

What happened to the man who sat outside in the sun too long? He died of skin cancer.

What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

What kind of a prediction is THAT?

Why did Billy go into the white van? Because his parents came to pick him up from school.

Two guys walk into a bar.

why?

Q: what do you call obama A:a dumbass

why did the chicken cross the road??? I don't know, that's why I asked you -_-

whats better than 69? doing it with jarads mum!!

What do you call a toddler with a gun? Interesting

Roar, roar! I am the king of the jungle! But did you know the lion would be defeated by a polar bear in a battle between the two?

it depressed me to be diagnosed with depression

What's the square root of 69 Jimmy? Square root of 69 is 8 something right? Cus I've been trying to work it out oh. Jimmy! It's 8.306623863 >.

A man opens his sock drawer, grabs his socks and puts them on.........He dies 5 minutes later.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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