A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "What'll it be?" The man quietly gazes out at the other people in the bar. He continues to do this for a while, until eventually the bartender calmly taps him on the shoulder to get his attention, and the man turns to look over at him. "What can I get you today?" He asks the man. "What?" the man replies. Turns out he's deaf. Who knew?

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What's the difference between a duck?

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Socks.

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A:why did sam fall of the wing ? B:why ? A:she had no arms. B:... A:knock knock. B: who is there ? A:not sam

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He had no limbs

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What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

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GAME OVER!!!!!! OF COURSE!!!!!! I BEHELD AS SATAN FELL FROM THE SKY..: LIKE LIGHTNIIIIIIIIIIIING! Street Fighter 2: The (antijoke) Movie. Moral: Raul Julia, you are the man, rest in peace dude you made that movie a masterpiece, do not give this a thumbs up for me, but for the most brilliant performance he ever gave.

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A black man didn't walk into a bar

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im black

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What does ms colot like to eat? Pants

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What has legs but can't walk? A paralyzed man.

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There is a man with the surname of Westmoreland. This is a terrible name.

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I slipped and fell in the shower today. Good thing my dad caught me

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Why did the child get cancer? Because there was a family history of it.

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Woman rights.

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what has 50 legs, but can't walk? half of a centipede

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How do you turn a broken skateboard into a gleaming Rolls Royce? With magic.

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Can Geico save save you 50% on your car insurance? Does a former drill sergent make a terrible therapist?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He lacked the required muscular, integumentary, and nervous systems required to do so (among other essential bodily systems).

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A white man wakes up in the middle of the night and sees a black burglar trying to steal his hard earned possessions that he slaved many hours for, being a man who enjoyed living a man of luxury and hates people of foreign nature who steal his things said to him. " get out"

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How did th-A fridge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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