for keeps?

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Nothing, he also had no parents.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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So this guy walks into a bar. As soon as he gets in, a drunk dude punches him in the face ! The dude was drunk enough to not know what he was doing, but still sober enough to hit the guy hard ! So the guy had a cerebral commotion and died 2 days later.

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how do you make a blonde snowman? hollow out the head.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jahova's witnesses.

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Two people were playing Monopoly. One was a blonde and one was black. The blonde said, "your turn".

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What's worse than finding a fly in your coffee? The holocaust. What's worse than that? Two flies in your coffee.

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cancer

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Why couldn't the Canadian taste the maple syrup? Because someone cut off his tongue. -BLLJ

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what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

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Two men walk into a bar... ..I didn't say what type of bar...

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N Porn.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. He values his privacy and will not tell me his motives.

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What causes floods? Too much water.

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What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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Hey, I just met you... No, I'm your brother. You've known me for 30 years. You must have memory loss.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Plenty of things

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A priest, a midget, and the toothfairy walk into a bar. Barack Obama.

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knock knock, whos there? your neighbor's cat..no not really, but your sister just got raped

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george goodburn is secretly mexican

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Nicholas Salek did not write the message below. It was a joke one of his mates played!!

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Why did Eve eat the fruit first? Because women are whores.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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