A child rides by his mother on his bicycle and says "Look Mom, no hands!" The child doesn't come back, and night falls but he has yet to come home. His mother calls the police and a search begins 2 days later. He is never found is presumed dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the man cross the road? To attend his wife's funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "What'll it be?" The man quietly gazes out at the other people in the bar. He continues to do this for a while, until eventually the bartender calmly taps him on the shoulder to get his attention, and the man turns to look over at him. "What can I get you today?" He asks the man. "What?" the man replies. Turns out he's deaf. Who knew?

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call a Jew and a black mans offspring? A human

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock, knock. Whose there? Tits. Tits, who? SUCK EM'!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Two cats were in a bathtub. They both, however, were uneasy the whole time, as it is common sense to know that cats do not like being in water.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Me: I have a great knock knock joke but you have to start it off. You: Knock knock Me: who's there? You: silence as the person is confused as what's going on

thumb_up thumb_down +26

My new Muslim friend is the BOMB

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Diseases show if a prerson lacks vitamins and minerals.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do Chinese people call Chinese food? Food.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you wh*re

thumb_up thumb_down +24

"Knock, Knock" "who's there" "John doe" "John doe who" "I told you my my name was john doe"

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Jeff goes to the store, Helen Keller.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a person at your door? Whatever his name happens to be.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

You're Adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A black guy and a white guy are in a drug store. Who buys the drugs? The customers.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what's worse than getting a paper cut? Hiroshima

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was the white man poor? Because he could not hold a stable job for his wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A: Knock Knock! B: Who's There? A: I Am...

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why doesn't the South Pole war veteran remember the name of his child? He is a penguin and could care less about naming his children. Why doesn't the penguin on the North Pole remember the name of his child? There are no penguins on the North Pole.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Do u liek mudkipz GO TROLLING

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops