What did Joan of Arc have for her last meal? Steak

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do you call a man with three eyes and eleven fingers? his name

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red Violets are blue i got one question Screw You

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what's the worst thing ever? reality TV shows and singing contest shows

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Jamie stegman is a masive idiot and does not have a life at all he is a tool which is true becuase no one likes him

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, And I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock,knock whose there? The pizza delivery guy the pizza delivery guy who the pizza delivery guy who didnt give you your pizza

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Womens Rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was the boy sitting alone? Because all his friends died.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

xavier stop

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a flying jew? Smoke.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Someone asked me yesterday why my friend Portier is named after a sports car... I mean, fair enough, it is a common misconception but they live in the country and her Dad drives a tractor; think it through. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Jingle bells Batman smells WHERE IS SHE??!!?!?!?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's black, dangerous and sits in a tree ? A crow, with a machine gun !

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Yo momma's so fat, her lifespan is probably going to be very short and you will have to bury her soon.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

''thanks for giving me back the money i lent you david''-said nobody

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the girl drop her ice cream her cone broke

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops