Why did the man stop chewing gum? I threw a grenade at him.

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Dylan Hodge fingered himself. Hah.

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what's worse than a kitten scratching your arm? A dead baby scratching your arm...

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What does a gay horse eat? HEEEEEEYYYYYY!

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How do you kill half of Mexico? You use nuclear weapons in major cities.

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Obama: And then I said there would be a change. (hahahahahaha)

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who is the wildest wild one? matt daly

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Two scientists walk into a bar. One says "I'll have H20", the other says "I'll have a beer." The first one is the one to drive them to their homes.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Nothing, he also had no parents.

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So this guy walks into a bar. As soon as he gets in, a drunk dude punches him in the face ! The dude was drunk enough to not know what he was doing, but still sober enough to hit the guy hard ! So the guy had a cerebral commotion and died 2 days later.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Why did the chicken lay an egg? Because she got knocked up.

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how do you make a blonde snowman? hollow out the head.

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Hear the one about the deaf guy? Neither has he.

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A person expresses their opinion online. Another person thanks them for sharing their opinion but kindly disagrees, then he wishes the other person to have a good day.

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In Kentucky...your grandmother rapes you.

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what do you get when you cross a scotsman who doe'snt know anything about football,and a indian who doe'snt anything about football .blackburn rovers , and a good night out.

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for keeps?

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What happened to the man who worshiped Satan when he died? He died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. He values his privacy and will not tell me his motives.

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What causes floods? Too much water.

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What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

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Two people were playing Monopoly. One was a blonde and one was black. The blonde said, "your turn".

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cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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