What causes floods? Too much water.

What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

A priest, a midget, and the toothfairy walk into a bar. Barack Obama.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Plenty of things

knock knock, whos there? your neighbor's cat..no not really, but your sister just got raped

What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

Roses are Red Violets are Gay This poem makes no sense Octopus

Me: Ask me if im a penguin friend: are you a penguin? me: no.

Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? In a desperate, but unsuccessful attempt to save his mothers life, as a serial killer pulled her into his van

is this the krusty crab? no this is child services were taking your children.

george goodburn is secretly mexican

what do you call a fish with no eyes? fsh

Man 1: HEY DUDE! Man 2: Go shoot yourself

Whats hotter than the sun? Larger stars.

Why did Eve eat the fruit first? Because women are whores.

Nicholas Salek did not write the message below. It was a joke one of his mates played!!

keep your eye off me if you dont look at me, how do you know i looked at you? there is a mirror

Roses are red Violets are blue Elephants cant jump Neither can amputees

Sorry not thinking here, of course I will arrive sooner, give me 20 minutes or so (got to scout the area, you never know) As for coding, there is no hidden meaning so yeah... That is probably some "Neronist" coding format I never knew of I am using so well. Cant drive like this, so I will use a cab and wait for you at the back seat or something, I will let the Taxi cab honk the numbers of code here so you can come out knowing its safe. I sincerely thought you where at the home, according to our coordinates you are... Dont tell me that bastard built some basement over there, wow! I really miss him now, if nothing else because I would have liked a wine cellar made in less than... Sorry, ill be there asap, 20 minutes or less, nah, believe me, "fancy" is the least of things I want, and I wont be changing my mind anytime soon. See ya. I am sincerely surprised you even remember me, then again I look a lot like your crush. Abel (in case you where wondering, this is not my name either, but you get the picture by now)

Why did the chicken cross the road To get to your house Knock knock: whos there? The chicken duh

A man finds an old lamp, rubs it, and releases the genie trapped inside. The genie grants him three wishes. So the man wishes for a million more wishes and uses them all wisely,

Yo mama so fat that.....NooNoooNooooooo (strips)

Sticks and stones may break my bones... and my pistol will kill you.

Why i'm breathing? I don't want die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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