Women.

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3 guys walk into a bar. The fourth guy ducks.

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Heat oven to 375°. Grease 18 regular-size muffin cups (or 12 large size muffins). In bowl, mix butter until creamy. ... Add eggs one at a time, beating after each. Beat in vanilla, baking powder and salt. With spoon, fold in half of flour then half of milk into batter; repeat. Fold in blueberries.

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The Irish man was sober.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: It didn't, some dude ran it over.

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What do you call a Mexican on a boat? A sailor

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What do you call a black man working for Bank of America? A successful individual.

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why did the lesbians shop at modell's? because they thought the store had reasonable prices and considerable discounts

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What do you call a comedian who can;t make people laugh? A bad comedian.

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Why do guys like Halloween? Martin Luther posted the 95 theses in 1517 on this day.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I thought I was ugly But then I met you

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Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did Riley cross the road? A: I lied he started to then proceeded to get hit by a bus filled with children causing them all to be scarred for life.

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EVERYBODY THUMB THIS JOKE DOWN

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Why did the two men kiss? Because they were both homosexual and attracted to members of the same sex.

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Why did the fat kid drop his Mcdonalds? Because he had a stroke.

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how much is a microwave full of dead babies? a fridge full of dead puppies.

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Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

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Snausages.

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what's shaped like a tree? a tree

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There was a screwdriver and a spoon. What did the screwdriver say to the spoon? Nothing because neither of them are living objects and it is impossible for inanimate objects to talk.

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What did the man say after falling off a bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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A man walks up to a dead baby. The baby is dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops