why did the frog cry? Because he didn't get a message

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get the results of his AIDS test

amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

God is real

Your mama's so poor, that it's hard for her to pay her bills.

What can fly for only a short period? A jumper.

Why can't a blonde woman drive? because she was shot in both legs and cannot operate the pedals without extreme pain.

Q: Why can't white people dunk? A: because they can't jump high enough

Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

Why did the cat die? Because it got shot by a teenager who was promply put in juvi and was fined $100,000 for animal abuse. The parents gave up on him and didn't pay the fine or bail and left their son to rot in jail.

So a man walks into a bar and wonders why he walked into the building instead of simply just walking through the door. The man then realized that the building was if fact not a local bar, but instead a bowling alley. He was hallucinogenic and was in serious danger as he approached the candy man in the alley.

There is a British man, a Mexican man,and a American man on a boat. The captain sad the boat is carrying to much weight so the each have to throw off something they have to much of. The Brit throws tea, The Mexican throws tacos, and The American throws the Mexican.

Black History Month

Why are asians such bad drivers? Cause they constantly have their eyes closed.

What did the rapist say to the woman? "If you tell anyone I'll kill you!"

What happened when the Mexican man contracted the muscles of his large bowel after a large meal? Shit made its way to his anus

Goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wanna hear a joke..... Corey Jacobs Scrotum!

Why did the house stink? There were decomposing bodies under the floor boards.

what does a black person and an elephant have in common? what? they are both living beings who have their place in the world.

you had me at "hello", no need to add "you're under arrest"

i dont like attention whores lol

What do you call a woman with a black eye and several cuts on her face? The police and perhaps a social help hotline. She now feels safer and more secure and will go on to lead a happy life thanks to you speaking out on her behalf.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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