What's harder than nailing a baby to a tree? My penis whilst im doing it.

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WHat did Helen Keller get for Christmas? an ipod

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 is a serial killer.

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WNBA

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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If one of us goes, all of us go. If we all go, none of us are left out.

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Why did the man fall off the cliff? I pushed him????????

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Knock Knock! The man inside chooses not to answer the door and the caller walks away.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Nothing, he also had no parents.

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Whats Something everyone has except david? Money.

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How could you ever watch a man hit another man and say nothing? UFC is on at 9:00pm.

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There's a plane with 5000 bricks in it, one falls out. How many bricks are on the plane now? 4999 How do you get an elephant in the fridge? U open the fridge,put the elephant in and close the fridge. How do you get a deer in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out and close the fridge. A lion is trowing a party and the whole animal kingdom shows up, what animal isn't there? The deer cause he's still in the fridge. A little old lady is walking threw an alligator and snake invested swamp. *The snakes and alligators eat her (wrong answer) The brick falls on her head

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lol a man is drowning

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Wow, so it is true, you are here the entire fucking time aren't you bitch? You and all "six billion of your followers of the dark", listen asshead, one thing is people asking ME when I FUCKING SIGN BOOKS (which does not happen all that FUCKING OFTEN!) Why I lead a fucking cult of sorts. Another one is having your goons stab me in the FUCKING EYE, and going "Oh I am like so sorry, please let me be the gayest I can be" People assaulting me because I use the "Moralman identity" IT IS MINE! My real FUCKING NAME IS NERO! I DON'T GO AROUND STEALING NOBODY`S SHIT!

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An Irishman and an Englishman are in a bar. Suddenly a wild Dragonite attacks. The Englishman promptly catches the pokemon and continues to enjoy his drink with his Irish friend.

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okay i know you read this far but this is the turning point

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Why is Santa's sack so big? He has a malignant tumour on his testicle. We're all very worried about him.

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roses are red , violets are blue , sugar is sweet and so are you. the roses are wilting the violets are dead. the sugar bowl is empty and so is your head

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What did the retard say to the other retard? *(incoherent gibberish)*

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Why did the tomato blush? Because it began to ripen.

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how do you fit 20 babies into a bucket? you put them into a blender. how do you get them out? chips.

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Knock Knock Who's there? No one. You're imagining things.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It was running from the black man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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