What do u call a short Mexican Nothing that's normal

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Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

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Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's alright now.

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Why did the little kid color outside the lines? He had Parkinson's Disease.

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What's green and has wheels? Boogers on a skateboard.

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a blonde, a brunette and a red head are robbing a bank, they hear the police coming, so they try to find a place to hide. The red head hides in cat cage, the brunette hides in dog cage and the blonde hides in potatoe sack. When the police come the brunetter says "Woof, Woof!" the red head says "MEOW! MEOW!" and the blonde says "P-O-T-A-T-O-E!"

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away privileges that she normally would have had had she not misbehaved.

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25

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your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

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What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

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what did the police do when they saw an arab running towards a building? Watched him run by because he was probably late for something

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What did the dog say to the cat? "Bark."

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Why could the boy not stop shaking? He has Parkinsons Syndrome.

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A serial killer kills a family of 5 He is never found and eventually kills himself from depression

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girls lacrosse

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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What do you say when you kill a pregnant lady? Double kill

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Two muslims walk into the bar, Everybody continues with their daily lives. One should not be judged by their race or religion as all humans on earth are as equal as one another and should be treated the same way..... And then the building blew up.

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what's red, blue, and white all over? The American Flag

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How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

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Life is an elephant, get married.

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When do scientologists go to church? When they are done looking at porn.

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I work for a Jewish Carpenter. He pays me minimum wage.

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The knocking didn’t cease. It grew harder as the voice grew louder. “Let me in! Let me in! LET ME IN!” The knocking grew so fierce it could have shattered the door. Tears leaked from her eyes. “What do I do,” she thought “should I open the door?” The knocking was more than she could bear. “I know you’re in there, Kat.” it said. Her stomach twisted, her breath caught in her throat, and tears now streamed down her face. “Go away!” she shouted finally. “Let me in!” it screamed in response. “Leave me alone!” she cried. The voice and the knocking echoed in her head, making her more nauseous than before. Reaching for the lock hesitantly, she sucked up her tears and held her breath, unlocking the door and throwing it open. Nothing was there. The tree stood in the yard unmoving, no wind. Nothing. She shut the door, shaking in fear. With the click of the lock, the room grew cold. Goose-bumps covered her skin. “Thank you for letting me in.” a voice whispered behind her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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