Why did the chicken cross the road? Because at some point through out the day, it had been relocated to the other side of the road. Since it was feeding time, it needed to return to the chicken coop or else risk death due to starvation.

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a sailor went to his G.P to see if he had HIV turned out he had hepititis C

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N Porn.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? NOT SALLY

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Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

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Yo Mama is so fat that she has to wear large clothes.

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Kendall and Nick Fredick

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What's round and red? A red and round solid.

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why did the chicken cross the road? the holocaust

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Last night I had a Chinese By that I mean I abducted some Chinese people and ate them

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sticks and stones may break my bones but hemophilia will make me bleed to death

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS.

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How do you make a baby cry? You punch him him the gut and slap him multiple times.

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Where did Suzy go during the bombing? Everywhere

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizz

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I've had amnesia as long as I can remember

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How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? none, you can't see them in the dark. V

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Why do migrant birds fly to the south? Because they can't get there on foot.

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"I like my women like I like my coffee, in a cup." -Paul Alangadan

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How do dinosaurs pay their bills? They don’t, dinosaurs don’t have a capital system.

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I thought I was a bird and I could fly Gravity painfully reminded me I was only a human

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See now that is confident and down to earth, reasonable, and all the etc etc`s, so what would you like me to fill them in with? Joking aside, you are smart, funny, you take a beating (sorry that`s today`s new low point, I have never hit a woman and never will, sure I punched down the GigaLesb when she lifted me up and my spine started making cracking noises, but that does not technically count as a woman). You are sweet, you are cute, you are funny, you are hot hot hot (hattrick see?), and yeah yeah if you want me to prove to people here that we know each other, sure, I met you once like 15 years ago? You kinda adored me, I could not take my eyes of yours (oh yeah, you got adorable eyes sure), and... You got huge breasts (Tits are more like those hanging you know what I mean) Sigh sometimes a boy wonders what he is doing with his life, he falls for the strangest girls... ...AND THEN SAID BOY FINDS HIMSELF BROKEN IN TWINE BY ME!

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" Hey you have something on your face. " ( man speaking punches the guy he was talking to ) " It was pain."

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Wanna hear a joke? Denver Broncos.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops