Q: What is the difference between everything and nothing? A: everything! Moral: NOTHING!

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Why did the man get a haircut? Because he had long hair.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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A jewish man, a black man, and a redhead walk into an electronics store. Because they work there.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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Q: Why did the Mexican jump over the fence? A: He went to go retrieve the ball that was kicked in his neighbor's yard. Afterwords, he continued playing soccer with his friends.

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What do dogs and cats have in common? They eat dog food, accept for the cat.

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What did the Muslim have under his hood of his car? A V-8 engine.

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why did the dog chase it's tail? it has a case of OCD where he was obsessed with catching his tail and would spin until he passed out or threw up.

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An asian without a future.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A Pilot

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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What do you call a loser on a game? A Dirty Hacker

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What happens to the man with cancer He dies Because the pharmaceutical company wanted to profit off a synthetic drug equal to marijuana

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What is funny about a child with down syndrome? Nothing.

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What do nappies and politicians have in common? Not a lot, although President Roosevelt suffered from incontinence due to polio as a child.

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A man walked into a bar. It hurt.

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Have you heard the deaf guitarist? He's really good.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Joseph. Joseph who? Joseph Brown. Oh, hello Joseph! Why don't you come in? No thank you.

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The 17 year old buy called his computers support number to remove a virus from his old computer, so he can gift the computer to his little cousin for his birthday. But before giving the computer to his cousin he downloaded over 120 hours of adult film onto it.

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What do you do with dead chemists? You carefully place their remnants in a casket, which is to be placed in a precisely dug hole. Once the casket is placed, you put a gravestone into the ground, signifying the chemists' date of birth and death.

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What's the most common pickup line in a gay bar? "Hi, may I buy you a drink?"

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How are Steve Jobs and The iPhone the same? They got progressively thinner over time.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I suck at Poetry, show me your Tits.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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