What do you call a black guy who sells drugs? a pharmacist

Helen got hit by a bus. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Helen!!

Like if you like big tits.

What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

What do a platypus and Obama have in common? A brain, except for Obama.

Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

Why are black guys good at basketball? Hard work and determination.

Why did the man eat his hat? Autism.

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bob saget

Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

I TOOK A STEAMING SHIT ON YOUR MOM

Who has killed more people than Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy, and Jack Kevorkian combined? Mr. Rogers

How do you punish an electrician? Kill his family.

Why was it sad that the kid was playing football? He had no arms and legs and he was the football.

why do birds fly away when you go near them? incase your black

What's purple and gross? Purple gross stuff

I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he is blind and has chemical burns all over his body.

Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

why are you people on anti-joke? BECAUSE you have NO LIFE !

Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

Why wasn't there a rainbow? It didn't rain.

How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "I should've voted Democrat!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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