what do you get when you cross a man and a horse? Collision

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Why did the fisherman die on a fishing trip? He had a heart attack.

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Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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Whats better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What's red, white, and black all over? A panda shot and killed by a poacher.

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A man got a promotion at work. Now he makes more money.

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There was once a boy named Swan, But then they built Autobahn.

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why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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how many jews can you fit in a volkenswagen? 2 jews in the front 2 jews in the back 15 jews in the ashtray

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to the gay guys house. Knock Knock! Who's there? The chicken.

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Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

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Q:how man ADD kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: I dont know, wanna go ride bikes?

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Pain Olympics.

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What's the difference between a large pizza and a Mexican? A large pizza can feed a family.

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Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: She got hit in the face with an axe

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Why did the kid tell yo mama jokes to insult other kids? His mom had just committed suicide due to depression caused by the kid's bad habits.

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Why did Alice fail Maths? Because everybody else was Asian.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

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At a feminist picnic there are no sandwiches.

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What's the difference between a nickel and a dime? Five cents.

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes and noise and they are promptly found by the invading German soldiers. They are all shipped to Aushwitz where two of them are sent directly to the gas chambers where they are killed. The third Jew survives the Holocaust and is eventually liberated by Allied forces. He returns to his country only to find his house burnt to the ground. With no money or food, he starves to death by the side of the road and his body is eaten by various animals.

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How long would it take for a clock to reach 12 It depends on which 12 it is going to land on and which time zone you are in but yet most clocks are not correct so it is very hard to tell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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