Q:whats yellow and flys through walls A:A magical Banana

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Knock Knock Who's There Santa Santa Who? I stole your dog.

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How did the mermaid break her arm? She fell out of a tree.

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why hppened when the little boy failed his math test? He cut off his penis, shaved his head and hung himself

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Why did little Suzy fall off the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Haikus are useful Actually they are not.... ....I am so sorry

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Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

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Why did the man have an erection? He had just masturbated.

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Why did the plan crash? Because the pilot was a potato

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-_- i like trains ... -_-

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Whats the difference between a pontiac and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a pontiac in my garage.

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What happened when the teacher told the class to be quite? The class was quite.

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What's worse than spending time with your girlfriend? Nothing.

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Why did the little kid color outside the lines? He had Parkinson's Disease.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third guy ducks.

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your father died

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Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

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What do u call a short Mexican Nothing that's normal

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I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I beat my family.

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Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

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(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

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Knock knock Who's there? Yo mamma Nobody's home, go away mom

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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