Ay Bee Cee Dee Ey Ef Gee Haych Eye Jay Kay El Em En Ow Pee Queue Our Es Tee You Vee Doubleyou Ex Why Zed Now you know your ABC, come along and sing with me!

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Two men are sitting in a pub. One man turns to the other and says: 'Last night I saw lots of strange men coming in and out of your wife's house.' The other man replies: 'Yes, she has become a prostitute to subsidize her drug habit.'

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What do you call a pen sitting on a counter? A righting utensil not being currently used.

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What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

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Two giraffes walk into a bar, hit their heads, cracktheir skulls and die.

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Why cant you find your handle? Because YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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What did the blonde get for Christmas? A Brain

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It was nice knowing you Erron, it really was.

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What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

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What do you get when you cross a Kangaroo with a sheep? A: That would be impossible for it is impossible to breed a kangaroo and a sheep due to their difference in genetic material and number of chromosomes

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Penal Dysfunction

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What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF What's white and fluffy? A BUNNY What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF What's brown and fluffy? A PORCUPINE

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fack me in the ace! CC

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What did the white man say to the black man? Nothing. Earlier that day his vocal chords were ripped out by an angry chimpanzee. He will never speak again

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Why do babies cry on airplanes? Because gay people are getting married.

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What did the gun say to the pencil? Draw

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Your mom's so hairy, she should go to the barber!

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Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Starving children in africa.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because Suzy had no arms.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "God" "Then come right in!"

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Why did the penguin die? due to an increase in the quantity of greenhouse gases that are being released into the atmosphere, global warming is on the rise. So the penguin died because his home melted.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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Knock Knock! Come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops