(-(-(-(--)-)-)-) Look the chinese mafia

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Shit I'm bleeding.

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A pregnant women walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender denies her service because she is under the legal age.

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47

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Why did Hanna fall of the swing She had no arms or legs Knock knock Whose there Not Hanna Haha

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What's long and hard? The Ap European exam that i just took.

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What is white and stands in the corner? A refridgerator who has been very bad...

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If you're doing a maths test, what type of pickles are best when licking a baseball bat? Sasquatch

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating in a lake? Bob.

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Okay, So a Cow, a Lumberjack and a Fireman walk into a bar. The cow asks the bartender, "What kind of milk do you have?" The bartender looks confused and asks," Why would a cow want milk?" The cow replies,"I've been producing milk all my life and I've never had a chance to try it. I'd just like some milk." The bartender replies,"Okay we have whole milk, 2%, and skim milk. What'll you have?" The cow says,"Whole milk, I want the whole deal." The bartender obliges. Next the Lumberjack comes up to the bar. The bartender asks, "What'll you have?" The lumberjack asks for some syrup. The bartender inquiries,"What kind of syrup would you like?" The lumberjack answers,"Pure Maple, imitation, or chocolate. All work for me." The bartender turns and pours a shot of pure maple syrup and turns away. Finally the fireman walks up the the bartender and says, "Can I have a glass of water?" The bartender turn and ask inquisitively,"Why?" The fireman quickly replies,"TO PUT OUT THE FIRE!"...

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How does a girl with no arms swing on the swing? She doesn't, she has no arms.

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A child walk's into a bar. And gets sexually abused.

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Why did the samurai commit Sepuku? Because it is an honorable Japanese tradition.

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Two black men jump off a cliff, who wins? Wins what?

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What's something 9/10 people enjoy? A gang rape.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? Well its wing were clipped so it couldnt fly across the road.

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what do you sit on, poop on, and sleep on? a bed, a toilet, and a chair

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why did the chicken cross the road cause he was suicidal but a car just didnt happen to hit him.

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Whats funnier then a dead baby? A lot of things.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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what did the blonde mail to her boyfriend? nothing, blonde's can't write.

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what's the difference between a dog and a sheep? one's a dog and the other isn't.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. What do flowers have to do with this joke I want to tell you?

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matty russel are you on here

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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