yo mama is so fat she is 1 candy bar away from dieing

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Q: Why was Sally crying? A: Because someone punched her in the face

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(Family sat down at table) *Child goes to start a story* - "I have a ginger friend.." Everyone bursts out laughing and leaves the child confused.

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Do you know why children in Africa don't read Harry Potter too much? Because they can't read.

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A priest, a midget, and the toothfairy walk into a bar. Barack Obama.

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My life sucks, I'm about 20 years old, and i haven't changed aged for 15 years, I'm stuck in this dead end fast food job, my colleague hates me, my boss is a money crazed freak, my best friend is a mentally retarded immature weirdo and to top it all off, I live in a pineapple under the sea.

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Lizzy doesnt shave or shower. She just went to the bathroom in the middle of the school hallway

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What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

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Why did the dog smile? It didn't. Humans are the only creatures on planet Earth capable of smiling, therefore, dogs are unable to smile.

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Kesley Ioannou not shopping.

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Where did Sally go when she exploded? Everywhere!

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? 10 dead trashcans in 1 baby

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what's worst than being gay? being black

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Ask me if I'm a human! - Are you a human? No. The correct term would be a human being.

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What do you call a gay Mexican guy who is deaf, has no arms, no legs, and is bald? Whatever his name is.

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What did the boy do before school? Jacked off.

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A hispanic walks down the street. ICE quickly arrests him, as he is here illegally. 5 months after deporting, he crosses the southern US border to try again.

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Me and me!!!! LOL! i'm a comedian!

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What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

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What happens when you try to hand feed a shark You have one less hand

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Why did the kid fall over? He was hit by a car

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what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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