I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

Why did the girl commit suicide? She has been abused severely for seven years by her pet kangaroo.

Knock knock? Who's there? To. To who? To WHOM.

Why does jim never go to McDonalds? his wife got shot there.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

What do you call 99 lawyers in a car going off a cliff with no driver and another lawyer running in the other direction? A dick move.

What did the coach do to the player Coached the player

"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

Womens Rights.

What happened when Aladdin rubbed his lamp? It got slightly cleaner.

Jesus Christ walks into a bar and the bartender says "Holy crap it's Jesus!" and everyone quickly updates their Facebooks.

What's Worse Than Unripened Fruit? Crippling Depression.

I like my women like I like my coffee, without a dick

Why did the pedophile get arrested? He was driving way over the speed limit.

Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

Johnny Manziel is the best quarterback ever (this isn't a joke only a true statement)(this is a remake of a previous joke)

Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

how do you save a black guy from drowning. with a life preserver.

Why did the fat kid drop his Mcdonalds? Because he had a stroke.

What do you call the man who graduated medical school last in his class? Doctor

Roses are red, Violets are black, Why is your chest, as flat as your back

Did you hear about the Blonde who fell off a cliff You Have? Oh Ok, Have a nice day

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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