What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What is worse than having sex with a dead baby in front of it's mother? Not a lot.

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A man walk into a bar he buys a few drinks. When he is done the bar tender gives him his check. Man told the bar tender he has no money to pay for it. Bartender says," ok how about this we have a horse in the back that hasn't laughed a day in his life if you can make him laugh you get the drinks for free." so man proceeds to do so. A few minutes later man comes out horse is dying. So the man gets his drink for free. A few days later man comes back with the same deal. So the bartender tells him" that horse hasn't stopped laughing since you went back there. If you can make him stop you get your drinks for free." Man goes in a few minutes later comes out horse is crying. Man man is remarked by how he did it but he doesn't question it. A few days past the man comes back an the horse is still crying...... So the bartender ask the man how he did..... Man says," first I told him I had a bigger dick then him....second time I proved it"

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An Englishman, an American, and an Australian walk into a bar. They speak English to each other.

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If life gives you melons you're dyslexic.

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why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

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There was this guy who walked in the bar with one shoe. The bartender asks what happened. The man said the shoe didn't fit. So the bartender ask where is the other shoe. The man said he threw it away. The bartender looks in the trashcan and sure enough he sees his other shoe. The bartender says "This is the same size as your other shoe. Why are you wearing one shoe?" The man says "I'm just playing a prank on you. There's a hidden camera over there and over there. Is it okay if I can put you on YouTube?" and the bartender says "No."

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FUCK YOU NEVEN

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Why we in a Falln tank!!!? Be cause the plane exploded!!!!!!!

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What starts with 'P' and ends with 'orn'? Popcorn.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

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Why did the Filipino hate internet advertising? Because navigating around a webpage with pestering visual and audible promotions often proves cumbersome and distracting from the task at hand.

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Helen got hit by a bus. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Helen!!

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Let's see how many dislikes this can get!

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Why do reindeer pull Santa's Sleigh? Because Santa won't feed them if they don't.

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Why was it sad that the kid was playing football? He had no arms and legs and he was the football.

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69

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look at this bag of air it has some chips in it

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Knock knock. Is someone there?

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Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

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How do you punish an electrician? Kill his family.

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Why are black guys good at basketball? Hard work and determination.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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