What's small and harmless, but deadly when thrown at high speeds? A baby.

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how many moms can you fit in a bathtub? as many as you want

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.... Take my wife..... .... She is lovely....

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What's worse than dying? Dying poor.

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What starts with P and ends with orn? Porn

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Gotta go Mark Gotta go Mark MARK MARKMARKMARK! Moving at the speed of mark I'm the quickest mark around Got ourselves a mark Start getting a new mark Without any mark On top of mark! Go- Go- Go- Don't mark Don't mark Just markmarkmarkmark! mark, he's on the run mark, he's number one mark, he's coming next so watch out for mark X! Gotta go mark, gotta go mark mark mark markmarkmark Go go go go go go go go go! marrrrrkkk X!!

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Whats worse than jizzing while your on a date? Shitting in you pants while your on a date.

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How do you stop a black guy from drowning? Take your foot off his head.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I Lied, it was a cow not a chicken and it was a highway full of speeding cars slamming into the cow body until it would stop moooooooooooooooooving...

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A man and a woman are alone, the man holds her down and says I'm going to rape you! The woman replies I'm not into that and leaves unharmed

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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Why was the man crying? Because he was punched in the stomach.

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A priest, an iman, a rabbi, a bishop and a Dalai Lama walk into a bar. Because they were of different faiths, racial slurs were thrown back and forth until they all left. They spent the rest of the night and most of the following day unhappy.

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Doctor, I've caught a cold. Take a Halls.

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What's worse than having the name Riley Bathurst? being shot in the head by a black guy.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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why did the zack fall off his bike because his mum thew a frege at him

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Why did the man have trouble breathing after meeting the President? He had a collapsed lung.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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A circus clown riding the cutest miniture Shetland pony both fall over a cliff and die.

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Q: whats worse than a Muslim? A: a Jew

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As for regarding the Win/Win/Win/sore ass kid comment below... Why not? There is too much Win in order to worry about some fucking soreass thats just gonna grow up to be a slut... RIGHT? Your friendly r*pist Neighborhood r*pist Moral: Man: "He or she who knows I am right, will be be the only one left" Btw, I am the Anti-God, what else can I be? You are the ones that killed Christ Ahahahahahaha! Political humor bonus because my satisfaction of owning you all and your entire screen. Are you Right Winged? Or wrong Winged?

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Give this a thumbs up cuz mi spelin is baad

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boy? Nothing. He's been dead for over three years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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