What did the man without a tongue say...

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Why was there two girls at the movie? They wanted to see the movie together.

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What does a black man, an Asian Man, and a Jewish Man have in common? They are all men.

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A Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. What hit the wall first? Probably his penis.

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.

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a man runs into a bar and screams, he is sent to a doctor for a minor concussion and receives some stitches. He recovers over time and gets on with his life.

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Silly Sally Dillydallied then lost her job to outsourcing.

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Why did the rapist go to the girl's dorm? He wanted to apologise for his crimes, and brought them all a drink. It was spiked, he raped them

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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Wanna hear a joke? JORDAN SANDERS IN A RELATIONSHIP.

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Friends are like bananas. If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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Why did the plan crash? Because the pilot was a potato

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girls lacrosse

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A serial killer kills a family of 5 He is never found and eventually kills himself from depression

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What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

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whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies and their grieving mothers standing over them. thats what.

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A duck walked into a bar. He asked for a drink and the bartender gave him it

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Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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why did the frog cross the road? because he was attached to the duck

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What's worse than spending time with your girlfriend? Nothing.

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What's better than winning the Paralympics? Having legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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