Whats green and looks like eggs? Green eggs.

A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

Not sure, its just a really rare combination, people tell me stuff like "oh they are really bright brown" like hell they are, I mean sorry but the hell they are. I prefer it the way you say it, they are red, really really red, and you do not say it as if I had something to be ashamed off.

What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney? Nothing chimneys don't talk

A bartender walks into a bar. It's his shift.

How did the blonde burn her ear? In a terrible accident involving molten lava.

What is the result of a couples' feud? 96.

What's sad about the Holocaust? well i don't know ,it may or may not have anything to do with you and cause absolutely no sad emotions toward the subject. I for one don't care.........

A dislexic man walks into a bra. He then proceeds to enjoy the breasts that he has stumbled upon.p

Bloody kids ...

Three monkeys are sitting in a tree. Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? -He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -Peer pressure.

Whats worse than a gay pride parade? Genocide.

A man walks into a bar. The other one ducks.

Guess what I saw today?..........Nothing I'm Blind.

What is brown and gurgles? dead baby casserole

Why did the audience laugh at Chaz Bono? Because he told a funny joke.

Whats a black persons favorite flavored cake? fried chicken.

What did the avocado say to the person? I can't talk

your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

YOU SUCK RYAN V!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! U SUCK BALLS!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is not mean't to be a joke, but I have noticed the least popular thing on here is the Jew and the Pizza joke. I am Jewish and find this extremely offensive. I applaud all of those who gave it a negative vote and realize the Holocaust is not a laughing matter.

Two tubes of ice cream are sitting in a freezer, one turns to the other and says "its bloody freezing in here" God then corrects this apparent mistake in the combined laws of physics and biology

Have you ever heard of Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

girls lacrosse

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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