An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had just been to their father's funeral, who was a Welshman.

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What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

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what's the difference between 7 and 2? 5

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Can you say the word "toy boat" 10 times fast? No

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Roses are Red Violets are blue I like poo F*** on You By drew bolton

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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matty russel are you on here

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why did the man leave the restaurant? because he was done with his meal

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whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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A mormon walks into a bar. He orders a caffeine free Coke.

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girls basketball

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what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? If you know the answer then you should probably stop sniffing paint.

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Hey I just met you And I am crazy So I will kill you And eat your body

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When life gives you melons, youre probably dyslexic.

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What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

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Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

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Q: What did the blonde woman say? A: My hair is blonde

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what do you sit on, poop on, and sleep on? a bed, a toilet, and a chair

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs being pulled behind a boat? A: Skip.

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Why did Jack explode? He had a sneezier and his army friend Stephan threw a grenade at him because he was scared.

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you dirty racist.

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what did the man do when he went to save the other man from drowning? drowned with him...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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