What is the difference between a black guy and a road? One you put tar on and the other one is a road

What does a paralysed mans legs feel like? We don't know, he is paralysed

What did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing. They're muffins.

why do birds fly away when you go near them? incase your black

A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

What happens when you shoot a priest in the heart? He dies.

Who has killed more people than Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy, and Jack Kevorkian combined? Mr. Rogers

Two Penn-State Advisors walk into a butt.

Knock Knock Who's there? A mormon *slam*

What do you call six million jews? Dead.

Cows go moo.

What's one thing good about cancer? (make them guess) Nothing you fricking prick!

Why is Kony hated by the kid with ADHD? Hey look a kid being raped while watching his family getting killed.

Why did the man stand on one foot? Because he had one leg.

Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A: The dead baby was once alive, while the ferrari couldn't possibly have lived since it's a car and cars are inanimate objects.

If a man has a gun, but no arms or legs, is he armed?

Why doesn't Michael J. Fox drive a stick shift? He was raised in an urban area and was only taught to maneuver with vehicles that shifted automatically.

why did the chicken cross the road? i don;t know, that's why i was asking you

What do you call something that has two legs, arms and is bloody all over? My ex's new boyfriend.

Why wasn't there a rainbow? It didn't rain.

Want to here a joke? Then get off this site!

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "I should've voted Democrat!"

One day Satan, approached his dad and said: DADDY I love you so much, I want to be just like you! That story did not end up so well did it?

Fox News.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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