If you like this song so much why don't you marry it? Because a divorce would be tough on the kids

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A chickens walks into a bar... And greets her fellow friends

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Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths and thus suffered from survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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Patient: Doctor, I've been having a problem, I can't remember anything. Doctor: Do you think you might have amnesia, a common memory problem. Patient: What Problem?

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wanna here a joke??? read below...

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What will happen if your heart skips 10 beats? Nothing. You're dead.

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what do a plane and a mouse have in common? nothing

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What did the cast of sex and the city get for Christmas Nothing Sarah Jessica Parker is Jewish

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roses are blue violets, are orange, i am color blind

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then he sits down to enjoy his evening.

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What do you call a girl with one leg at your door step? Ilean

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and stink.

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Why did the chicken kross the road? It didn't because it was a highway and it got hit by a bus.

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As little Timmy crossed the finish line his heart raced with excitement he had just won the big race. Later he and his family went home to celebrate they had pizza and chips and soft drinks. Then they played scrabble and watched spiderman 2. After that Timmy went to sleep. When his parents found him that morning they mourned and mourned because their hero little Timmy was still asleep.

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a man pulled up to a girl in a white van with tinted windows. he told the girl he had candy inside. she got in the van. he then proceeded to rape becasue he was a rapist and that is the lifestyle he choose to have.

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What's worse than loosing your pen? Getting raped by a pedophile.

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What's worse than discovering that you have contracted HIV? Stumbling upon a mass genocide. HIV's pretty bad though.

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what time is it? 3:16

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whats worse than finding out you have Alzheimer's? Finding out you have Alzheimer's

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E= McVagina

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SCP-009-J is missing. Where has it gone? Is it under the table? Was it sat upon? Is it there on the ceiling? Is it under the rug? Was it gobbled right up by a quantum pillbug? Did it run through the tunnel? Did it fall down the stair? Was it sent back in time to a carnival fair? Did it get on a train to a far-away place? Is it locked in a falsified beacon from space? Did it fall in the oobleck and [DATA EXPUNGED]? If it clogged up the sink, will it have to be plunged? Just where has SCP-009-J gotten to? Oh wait, that's right! SCP-009-J is you!

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What did the President give his wife for her birthday? Women's Rights.

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- Are you thinking what I'm thinking B1? - No.

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Son: Dad what does it mean to f***? Dad: Jimmy! don't use that kind of language.. use the word chainsaw instead. Son: Ok, well what does it mean to chainsaw? Dad: Well as you know, God created people, he started with Adam and eve and then he- Son: You keep referring to god as a he, are you suggesting that God has a penis? I guess that would explain the big bang theory... right? get it? Dad: ... Go chainsaw yourself, Jimmy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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