what is worst than finding a worm in your apple? finding half a worm in your apple

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put my penis in your mouth

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its dopaminergic neurons fired synchronously across the synapses of its caudate nucleus, triggering motor contractions propelling the organism forward, while emitting 'cluck' distress signals, to a goal predetermined by its hippocampal road mappings.

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Why are you reading this? You should be taking a shower, you smell like crap.

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a drumset fell off a clif. Badoom ch.

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What's the worste part about alzheimer's disease? You forgot you have AIDS.

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Your mother is so fat........... that she is morbidly obese and is at severe risk for diabetes and other weight related diseases.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I doubt it thought much about this. The chicken is a simple animal, and i doubt its actions were spurred by any particular motivation.

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Q: what did 7 say to 11? A: weres every one else?

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3 Mormon men walk by a blonde woman eating a banana. They are not distracted by this and continue their journey of spreading Christianity.

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What did one chimney say to the other chimney. Nothing, chimneys dont talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

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What do you get when you put a cat in a Xerox machine? A copycat.

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19th amendment

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What's green and has wheels? Boogers on a skateboard.

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A blonde, a redhead, and Asian are talking. They are friends.

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69

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? The same number it would take people with any other hair color.

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1: Knock. Knock. 2: Don't come in I'm naked.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbour. My neighbour who? Timothy, welcome to the neighbourhood!

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Why are oranges blue? Wait there orange... right

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Why couldn't Sally ride a bicycle? She doesn't have a bicycle. She also doesn't have legs.

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There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

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What's red and smells like green paint? The rotting corpse of the old lady I poisoned with green paint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops