I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Q: whats worse than a Muslim? A: a Jew

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Why did the man have trouble breathing after meeting the President? He had a collapsed lung.

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Your mother is so stupid that she has trouble discerning certain facts from fiction.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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A black teenager drives an Escalade His father is a prominent lawyer and his mother is a neuroscientist.

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What happened when the turtle rolled over on his back? It proceeded to die because it couldnt find a way to roll over. An African tribe then decided to make the recently decised turtle into a delicious soup that lasted him and his family three days.

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If life throws you melons you might be dyslexic, but you also might not be.

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Knock Knock. Whose There? Lettuce. Thats impossible.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? why? Womens rights

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A man walk into a bar he buys a few drinks. When he is done the bar tender gives him his check. Man told the bar tender he has no money to pay for it. Bartender says," ok how about this we have a horse in the back that hasn't laughed a day in his life if you can make him laugh you get the drinks for free." so man proceeds to do so. A few minutes later man comes out horse is dying. So the man gets his drink for free. A few days later man comes back with the same deal. So the bartender tells him" that horse hasn't stopped laughing since you went back there. If you can make him stop you get your drinks for free." Man goes in a few minutes later comes out horse is crying. Man man is remarked by how he did it but he doesn't question it. A few days past the man comes back an the horse is still crying...... So the bartender ask the man how he did..... Man says," first I told him I had a bigger dick then him....second time I proved it"

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What starts with 'P' and ends with 'orn'? Popcorn.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Knock knock Who's there A drummer A drummer who I'm not knocking on your door

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FUCK YOU NEVEN

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why is Justin Berber gay? hes not thats rust a myth

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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what is white and black and red all over? a half eaten penguin

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Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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Why did sally break her arm? A piano fell on her

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Helen got hit by a bus. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Helen!!

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If life gives you melons you're dyslexic.

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what did the parapelegic (limbless) kid get for his birthday? Heart failure

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops