knock knock who's there? a murder who? a murder who kills you and your family.

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What did the dead Catholic say to Atheist? Nothing. Dead guys can't talk!

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He loved working with tourists.

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Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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Who's gay and has buttsex? Dan.

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A guy walks into a bar Many people gather around him to see if he is alright and to tell him he needs to watch where he is going.

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My mom fell on our cat and it died.

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A black guy and a few other white guys steal a keg. They then proceed to have an awesome party consisting of extreme inebriation and a massive orgy.

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Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

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What is an Anti-Joke? This is.

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What do you call a gay black man driving off a cliff? A fine example of the dangers of drink driving.

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What did the dog say when the woman put a sweater on him? Nothing, dogs can't talk and he has no idea what is going on

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Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

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What did Helen Keller see on her trip? Nothing

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A man sees a clown, a robot, and a monkey walking down the street side by side. The man ponders the randomness of life.

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What do you call to guys who gave gave each other HIV? Blood-Brothers

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Take off your shoes.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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What's worse than banning guns? Very few things

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Apparently he can walk now.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? The average male weights approximately 1150lbs.

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How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

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What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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