why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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What has 4 eyes and can't see. Blind siamese twins!

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

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Knock Knock.

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Man walks into a gun store, buys a gun. The same man goes home and lives happily till he dies of cancer. His son takes the gun shots himself, survives then later dies of cancer.

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what happens when a Texan see's a black guy? he says howdy

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your ugly

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What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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Why did Doctor Who visit Ancient Greece? Because has a time machine and has that ability

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What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

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Suddenly the Titanic started sinking, its a shame it sunk before anyone managed to find out what it was sinking about.

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I took your mother out to a fine seafood dinner. I never called her again.

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Mike tyson

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Why did the little girl get a haircut? A; she has cancer.

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What's worse than an anti-joke? People who don't get the concept of an anti-joke and post regular jokes on this site.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Because I'm colorblind

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What do you call a pig with one eye? A pig.

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Your mama is so fat, her gravitational field varies with distance cubed!

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I haven't made a school shooting joke yet, but the day is young Just like those kids that got shot

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has two penises

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Whats the best ab workout? Solly Twist

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Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

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Knock knock Who's there? An elf. An elf who? An elf who wants to be a dentist.

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want a balloon? yeah

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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