Goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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Hey, did you hear about the guy who got his left arm and left leg cut off? Yeah, it was pretty brutal. His right arm and right leg got cut off, too.

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what do you call an astrounaut in space? an astrounaut you racist bastard

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Anne Frank

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Knock knock Who's there Santa who santa hates you and that is why you got nothing for Christmastime

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Where do you go when you die? Nowhere

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Why do women wear perfume and makeup? They smell bad and they're ugly.

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() () () () () () () ------ *__________* yo can go %$*# yourself =~~ 0

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Why do men find it difficult to look each other in the eyes? The answer actually has deep routes in their psyche, subconsious, and psychological development as children.

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A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

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A guy went to a haunted house on Friday the thirteenth… it gave him a small fright and he continued on with his day

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What did Sally get for Christmas? AIDS

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This little pig went to market, This little pig stayed at home, This little pig had pork chops, And this little pig was GONE...

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roses are red violets are blue im colorblind how about you

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Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

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why did the man fall over he was a loaf of bread

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What is the science of classifying living things? Racism...

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a horse is running across a cliff at 54 miles per hour, against the wind. he has been running for three hours. he needs to run for 347 more kilometers before he is tired. the wind is blowing at a speed of 10 miles per hour... he wonders if he will make it when suddenly he falls off the cliff. why did he fall of the cliff? it was a retarded horse.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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How are you? Yes

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What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

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poo is yummy

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Q: whats worse than a Muslim? A: a Jew

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Oh wait i screwed up, Because of u

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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