If you're happy and you know it - put your hands in the air i have a gun.

What is grey and smells like sand? A Rock.

What did the man say to his wife at the funeral. Nothing, he was dead

U ALL LIAK DIK

KASEEM IS CRAP AT GEARS OF WAR THIS IS NOT A JOKE ITS TRUE (FACT) PLAYSTATION IS BETTER THEN XBOX (BIGGEST JOKE EVER) IV HAD BOTH, SO SHUT UP PS3 BOYS AKA GIRLS

Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

A man and two women walk into the a house. When they leave out come 2 babies with them. What happened in that house? They were babysitting.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None.

Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He got cancer.

What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF What's white and fluffy? A BUNNY What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF What's brown and fluffy? A PORCUPINE

Why was the Black Panther upset? Because racial tensions were high in the 60s.

What's the best thing about twenty six year olds? There are 20 of them.

Q: What do you call a hobo asking for change? A: Get off my driveway!

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I suck at Poetry, show me your Tits.

A Woman decides she wants to stop making sanwiches for her sexist boyfriend. She walks away and lives a happy life. In hell.

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

A Jewish guy walked into a bar... and said "ow"

the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

Why did Doris want to father children? Because she wanted to have a fry-up with the leftover baby oil

Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. The man was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral service.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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