Roses are red, Violets are blue. Look at that bitches asss!!

Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

What kind of coins to you find at the bottom of the ocean? Wet coins.

What did the widow get for her birthday? Nothing from her husband.

whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

Roses are red, white, pink, and many other colors. Violets similarly display many color variations due to generations of ardent florists.

who's that hot blonde at the disco? your mother.

Q: What's white, sticky, and is swallowed by most women? A: Ice Cream

What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

Hey I just meet you And this is crazy I took bath salts Your face looks tasty

A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

I can't see my forehead

What happened to boy who fell down the stairs? He died. What happened to the girl who fell down the same stairs? The boy who fell down the stairs hit her down the stairs too and they both died What happened to the man fell down these very same stairs? He got peer pressure and committed suicide.

how do you make a door cry? twist its nob

What's worse than aids? Super aids.

why did the baby start crying? someone threw a brick at it

why is Justin Berber gay? hes not thats rust a myth

Why is this an anti-joke? Are you laughing? Exactly.

How do you make a clown sad? You hit him in the face with axe

What'd the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish, remember?

How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

What happened when the man rubbed the magical lamp? Nothing.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo Boo hoo? Boo hoo your parents are dead.

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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