What did I eat for my breakfast? My breakfast.

Knock Knock Who's there? *silence* Silence Who?

"Do you live in the United States?", said the man. "no." said the other man, "cool beans", said the woman.

What did the skateboarder do when he was trying to do an ollie kickflip 360 and tailslide on a rail and dismount heelflip to manual? He fell

Whats yellow pink and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? Oh were you expecting an answer here, if i knew the answer i wouldn't have asked a question.

I'm not late, I'm fashionably tardy!!!!

What is grey and looks like a rock? A rock

What do you call a fish with no fins? Dead.

So, a giraffe walks into a bar and orders six martinis and shame on for wanting a punch line this giraffe needs help.

What's old and has wet pants? My grandma with a bladder problem

-What's the worst part about killing a baby? -Probably either recieving the death sentence or living psychologically scarred in prison for life.

What can fly for only a short period? A jumper.

Jerry.

How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Generally one, however, in cases where the light fixture is unusually high, a ladder may be necessary. Some people like having a second person hold the ladder as they climb it. In this unconventional circumstance, it would take precisely two Jews to change a lightbulb. Also, Jews are bad people.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, And I'm color blind, So I don't give a shit

a man walks into a bar. ouch.

Whats cooler than being cool in High School? Nothing, now take a hit...everyone's looking

Want to hear a joke? ... Oh dear, I can't think of any. Golly, this is embarrassing.

what did the Alaskan homeless man get for Christmas? Death

Q: What weighs 6 ounces, is extremely dangerous, and lives in a tree? A: A sparrow with a machine gun.

What is the difference between a baby and a tampon? A tampon doesn't cry when it's hungry or tired.

There's a bunch of people standing around a retard...why is no one laughing? Its his funeral

Do you want to French kiss? What are you, racist

What did the boy with cancer get for christmas Nothing he didnt live that long

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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