An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

a horse walks into a blender ow

Your momma is so white, when she goes out in the sun it is necessary for her to use a lotion with an SPF greater than 30 because she burns easily and is also afraid of skin cancer.

Why did the chicken kross the road? It didn't because it was a highway and it got hit by a bus.

Two corns were decided to get married. In wedding, bridegroom can't find bride, so he asked a popcorn next to him, "Do you know where is the bride?" The popcorn answered, "I just change my hair style."

Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because he didn't have a face

matt f stupid because no one likes him

So this guy comes into a bar... Jizz eveywhere.

When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

There once was a man from nantucket. But he moved to California after he won the State lottery.

What do you call a pair of owls? Two owls.

Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

What's red, white, and black all over? A panda shot and killed by a poacher.

What does the orphan say to its parents? nothing, orphans dont have parents

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? NOT SALLY

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

#scabbers

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was Suzy Knock Knock Who's There The Holocaust

If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

how do you annoy people? make statuses from anti-joke.com

How much cocaine has Charlie Sheen done? enough to put your health at risk

Why did the British person go to the dentist? He had a poor diet which led to him getting cavities

E= McVagina

i like turtals and kids

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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