what did you call a bench full of white guys? The NBA

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and therefore could not see well without the help of glasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why didn't the man cross the road? He was paralyzed.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's worse than waking up next to an ugly girl? Waking up, sealed in a coffin which is floating on a raft traversing through shark-infested waters. Oh, and the raft is on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

i like pie.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

SCHNARRRRRR!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How much did the Holla Cost?

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's funny about using a shake weight? It resembles masturbating with a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

This comment has been removed for too many average votes.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the girl jump? Because she was on a trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

why hppened when the little boy failed his math test? He cut off his penis, shaved his head and hung himself

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having enough money to buy an apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A bartender walks into a bar. It's his shift.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night, To find nothing amiss.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Whats more crazy? Stabbing someone or killing someone? I don't know thats why I am asking you

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the mexican jump when he heard police sirens? The sirens where very lound and abrupt. Therefore startling this mexican man.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Chuck Norris died.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A Panda walks into a bar and orders a drink, he then shoots the bartender and leaves. The people are shocked and the panda is arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do u call a black rapper who only raps about sex and money? lil wayne

thumb_up thumb_down +26

what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a woman. Why couldn't hellen Keller have fun at the zoo? She was blind and deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

roses are brown, violets are brown, who the hell sh** on my garden?

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops