a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Irrelevant. The road is no place for chickens.

A man was getting surgery on his knee and the surgeon accidentally left a knife in his leg. The man's leg was severely infected and he proceeded to die in the following weeks. His family will mourn this loss for years to come.

How did the family of Cubans get to Florida? They flew first class from their home in upstate New York.

Roses are red Violets are blue your mum is fat and so are you

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face", the horse said nothing; because it is a horse.

Knock knock Who's there My BUTTCRACK

Wow, that makes your name a lot more comfortable to say... Not type, and you seem to be more sensitive than non-red hair girls. Besides its really nice, why do you dye it? Is it like red or ginger?

How do you silence a barking dog? You rip out its vocal cords.

Whats black, blue, and doesn't like sex? The little boy in my trunk.

What's the difference between a duck and a belt? One floats in water and I don't remember the rest but you are a whore.

Money is no object. Because I don't have any.

Roses are red, violets are blue i've got a gun, pointing at you

Q) 1+1=? A) 6.

Why did hitler commit suicide He looked at his gas bill

What's worse than your dad being hit by a car? Your family being hit by a bus.

What do you do when you see Godzilla? You offer him ice cream.

call me a bitch You're a bitch Only bitches do what they are told!

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzie.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he didn't have the guts.

YOLO.

tobi is so gay that he is the mayor of sanfrancisco

A Black Guy, A Mexican, A White guy, an Indian guy, Santa Clause and The Easter Bunny Jump off a 500 foot cliff. Which one dies? The all do. But Santa dies first because of his weight and mass.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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