What do you call a gay woman who likes to smoke cigarettes? A lesbian with a possible nicotine addiction.

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- *Commits Suicide*

Why did the bus driver get arrested? Because he hijacked the bus.

How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

The original "Chicken cross road" joke is a Anti joke in itself.

if life gives you lemonnde your probally halusinating

How do you wake up lady gaga? Set an alarm for an appropriate time

Q:What did the ginger get for Christmas? A: A soul...jk,hair dye

Q: how many oxen does it take to row up the empire state building in half of a green canoe under the purple sun while eating a dead moose with no arms? A: Purple, because snakes have no elbows.

A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

What did grandma receive for her 75th birthday? Alzheimer's.

A dog goes to his food bowl. He eats his dinner.

What's funnier than a comedic movie? Genocide

Guess what I did to the clown I hit it with an axe

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

why do blonds write TGIF toes go in first

Why was the white guy eating himself? He was a autocannibal.

Why was the black man a victim of racial prejudice? because he was black

why are asians eyes so slanted? because THEY WERE BORN THAT WAY!!!

How do you get a dog to obey your rules?¿¿? Threaten to beat it with a rod!¡!

Why are you reading this? You should be taking a shower, you smell like crap.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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