Ask me if I am a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Why was it sad that the kid was playing football? He had no arms and legs and he was the football.

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It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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How could problems have been avoided in the old west? Bigger towns

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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69

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colby doesnt shave

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"How come dinosaurs don't talk?" " I don't know. Why?" " Because they're dead."

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what did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

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Shotest joke ever... Your dick.

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the last joke.

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if life gives you lemonnde your probally halusinating

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How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

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What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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The original "Chicken cross road" joke is a Anti joke in itself.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Set an alarm for an appropriate time

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Q:What did the ginger get for Christmas? A: A soul...jk,hair dye

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A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

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Q: how many oxen does it take to row up the empire state building in half of a green canoe under the purple sun while eating a dead moose with no arms? A: Purple, because snakes have no elbows.

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Why did the bus driver get arrested? Because he hijacked the bus.

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Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- *Commits Suicide*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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