God bless America, and no where else.

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How are friends like bananas? If you peel off their skin and eat them, they die.

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An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

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What does rainbow stand for? Rick Astley Is Nesting By Our Window to harass us

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What's old and has wet pants? My grandma with a bladder problem

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whats worse than forgetting to buy cinnamon toast crunch at the grocery store? Getting beat to death with a gallon of rotten milk...

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What's good about freedom of speech? Only the idea. Try saying something about Muhammed or calling a cop a power-mad taxman.

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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guess what what that wasnt it

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Do you want to French kiss? What are you, racist

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Why haven't the Miami "Big Three" won a championship together? They don't play as a team. They rely on three people to score all their points when there are at least two other people on the court at all times. They jinxed themselves because they thought they were going to win every title until their contracts were up.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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I was born.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Obama is a good president, I beg to differ.

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What's big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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the WNBA

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Yo momma so Fat that she got picked for the Olympic Swim Team

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The name "Hunter Barksdale".

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Why couldn't Lucy get her driver's license? Because she has Cerebral Palsy!

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What do you call a black man with a PhD and loving family? A nigger

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How does the black, high school kid get his new clothes, IPod and nikes? By working at his family-owned convenient store with his father and grandfather every night after school, but not until his homework is done.

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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