What did the midget get for Christmas? A new watch and a gift card for Applebee's.

What happens when you stab yourself in the heart? You die.

What do you call a black guy who flies an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

A kid walks into a ctholic school and asks about the therory of evolution.

What's chris benoit doing? Just hangin in the gym

Why did the man stop chewing gum? I threw a grenade at him.

Why can't Sally ride a bike? Because Sally's a fish.

What did the 4 year old black kid ask his father for Christmas? A yo-yo. nah im just kidding he doesnt know who his father is.

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs sitting on a bench? Nothing. Why would you harrass a guy with no arms and no legs.

Why doesnt the ladder work? A ladder is an inaminent object therefore imcapable of having a job.

what do outgoing girls get on spring break? raped.

Which is correct grammar: 'I hasn't a penis got' or 'I doesn't a penis has'? Answer: They're both wrong.

what do you say to someone acting like an idiot? hey, if you keep acting like an idiot im gunna hit you with a freakin bat , you stupid fubu!

Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

What do yo call four Jewish guys sitting around doing nothing? The Sabbath Day

"What do you call a man who has bumblebee wings and fire for blood?" (The doctor on the other line has no answer. Tom desperately weeps into the phone, trying to grasp his sudden transformation. He finds no reassurance, and hangs up the phone.)

What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead woman? It is much more unlikely that you would have sex with a dead cat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? No particular reason. It probably wasn't even aware the the ground it was crossing is what's termed as a road.

Why are black people so tall ? Genetics. duh.

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

What's worse than Bieber fever? Yellow fever.

Why did the man climb to top of the tower? To push the Jew off.

banana

Q) Whats wet fishy and gets caught by fishermen? A) fish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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