A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

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What's the best way to look 10 pounds thinner? Lose 10 pounds

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What is it called when a Native American Indian man smacks a woman in the face for cheating on him? In police code it's called a "273D Domestic violence - Felony" most likely involving an insecure man with control problems simply adding to the stereotype that Native American's are drunk, abusive and domestically violent people.

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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i'm funny

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What's the difference between an elephant and a toaster. A lot of things.

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Your social life

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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Can you get me a stapler,make sure it has staples because if it doesn't..........I won't be a ble to staple anything

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Why'd the boy fall off his bike? The holocaust

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Who is so stupid they could literally be classified as mentally retarded? Evan Lovro

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It was dead.

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Why did the mass murderer abandon his killing spree? He found out it was illegal.

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Whats a box full of sand? a sandsquare

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A dog goes to his food bowl. He eats his dinner.

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What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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What did the man say when he lost all his hair? Man: My life has been getting worse and worse ever since I developed cancer.

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Whats the XBOX JUAN's most popular game. Call of Juarez!!!

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Why is the guy fat? Because he eats too much.

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A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

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Chuck Norris Isn't That tuff if he was he would come to my house and slam my head in they keyboaredehfiu;qbg;qebnuighqije9qp8ubwrsijpa

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How do you make a clown sad? You hit him in the face with axe

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Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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