Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

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Roses are red Violets are blue I kill children dont worry about it

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When life gives you aids, make aids-aid.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A fat man fell on him

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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What do you call a black man at harvard? Probably a criminal who is in harvard law trying to find a good lawyer.

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Why did the girl fall down the hill? Her boyfriend pushed her.

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What dud the dorito say to the other dorito? Nothing. Sorosis are incapable of speaking because they are doritos

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What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They're both Tom Cruise.

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.....Carrot Top....

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After a long romantic date with my girl friend I went home. Upon walking to my bathroom for a dootie i realize that I'm gay. So I break up with my girl friend and I am now in a wonderful relationship with Jose, He sell's sea shells at discount prices.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Why don't women know how to drive a car? Because there are no roads between the kitchen and the bedroom.

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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What's worse than finding a worm in Your apple?? A pile of dead babies

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Your momma is so fat, that her doctor recommended that she goes on a diet in order to prevent early death caused by a heart problem.

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Q: What do you call a bunch of blondes standing ear to ear? A: A wind tunnel!

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redtube

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Whats big, round, and full of helium? Michaels Balloon head!

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What's worse than being punched in the face? Being lynched.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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When a suicide-bomber when to heaven what did Allah give him apart from 72 virgins? 72 mothers in law.

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Q: What weighs 6 ounces, is extremely dangerous, and lives in a tree? A: A sparrow with a machine gun.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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