What do you call a man with a cigar in his mouth. A person with bad health and dirty teeth.

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, , /^\ ___ /^\_/ `...' /` ,__\ ,' ~ ( ,___\ ,, ., \ \___ \\\ .'.' .-. ) .'.-\\\`.`. '.-. ( / (==== ."". ( o ) \ ,/u `~~~'| / `-' ) "")^u ^u^|~| `""". ~_ / /^u ^u ^\~\ ". \\ _ /u^ u ^u ~\ ". \\ ( \ )^ ^U ^U ^U\~\ ". \\ (_ (\ /^U ^ ^U ^U ~| ". `\ (_ _ \ )U ^ U^ ^U ^|~| ". `\. (_ = _(\ \^ U ^U ^ U^ ~| ".`.; (_ -( _\_)U ^ ^ U^ ^|~| "" (_ = ( ^ U^ U^ ^ U ~| (_ - ( ~ = ^ U ^U U ^|~/ (_ = (_^U^ ^ U^ U / (_- ~_(/ \^ U^ ^U^," (_ = _/ |^ u^u." (_ (/ |u^ u.( (__/ )^u^ u/ /u^ u^( |^ u^ u/ |u^ u^( ____ |^u^ u( .-' `-, \^u ^ \ / ' .---. \ \^ u^u\ | ' ` ; | \u^u^u:` . `-' ; | `-.^ u`._ _.'^'./ "-.^.-```_=~._/ `"------"' Seahorse

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bob saget

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says: why the long face? Horse: I have cancer

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Roses are red Kittens are fluffy This doesn't rhyme Cupcake

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Why wasn't the clown funny? He didn't have a face

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So a man is sitting at a bar with about 20 girls sitting all around him. Amazed at this man's ability to pick up girls, another man asked him how he did. In response, the man said, "What?". The man wasn't able to hear the other man, due to the fact that there were many girls talking.

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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. :D

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A midget walks under a bar

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Why did the wealthy black man shoplift from the convenience store? He is a kleptomaniac.

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a tree? Nailing1 baby to 10 trees

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What do you call a politician on fire? A tragic death for the American public..

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roses are red violets are blue dinosaurs are extinct obama is black

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how did the man get down the stairs? he walked.

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21

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What's the difference between basketball and an elephant? One's a sport and one's a large African animal.

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What's red and hurts you? A brick.

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What is the square root of 69? 8.30662386

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What's green and gets people high? A green helicopter

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vagina, hehehehehehehe

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Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

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What's the difference between Google Chrome and Bing? Not much. They are both very reliable and informative internet browsers.

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Why was it sad that the kid was playing football? He had no arms and legs and he was the football.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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