What did little jimmy get for Christmas? A box containing the malevolent soul of a 10,000 year-old demon determined to torment his cat.

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Knock Knock Who's there? *silence* Silence Who?

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was being dragged by a truck

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bum sex lol

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Shoes

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Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

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whats red and falls from a tree an apple

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What do you call someone too young to drink? A minor

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What do you call someone who takes a toaster into their bath? Adele's number one fan.

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That moment when you try and finger your girlfriend and there no hole......and you start questioning your sexuality

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Bailey you suck at writing anti jokes quit!!!!!!!!!!! :( :( :( :( :(

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken crossed the road accidentaly as chickens are absent minded.

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What was jesus's first miracle? He made a blind man walk. And for the stupid people out there jesus's first supposed miracle was making a cripple Walk

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"Hello?" "Is your refrigerator running??" "Yes..." "Oh. Well then have a nice day."

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Why is Roenz Gay? He isnt.

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What is 9 + 10? 21

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How do you starve a blonde? You tie them up and deprive them of any food.

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after A-N-A-L

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A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

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A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. Since the man understands the meanings of most common phrases he responds in the correct and expected manner.

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I'm a raging homosexual.

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Q: Where does charlie sheen shop? A: Winners

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why did little Hannah not like the poem "Roses are Red" because she was colorblind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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