Why didn't little billy have any friends? Billy bought a rifle, and shot everyone he had ever seen or talked to, even his family. Billy then tripped on his walk home and fell off a bridge, and into the ocean. Then a shark came and swallowed him. That is why you should never kill your friends and family because it will come back and bite you. Don't be like billy

What is grey and looks like a rock? A rock

BBC have a new porn channel. C Boobies...

why was the boy sad? because he was raped by a clown.

A man buy's a new lawn mower, it breaks so he takes it back. The shopworker says that if you don't have a recipt then you cannot replace it, the man goes home and months later catch's a flu.

What do you do when you have those days where you feel that you go back three damn steps for every step you take towards your goal? DUUUUUH! You turn your back, see? Now you are getting three steps at the right direction for every right one! LOGIC!

What are we then hypocrites?

An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

What kind of cheese doEs god like? Swiss cheese because it's holy!

What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? This would be unlikely to happen, as it would cut the story short.

Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: Your mother sucks.

Yo momma so Fat that she got picked for the Olympic Swim Team

a boy says hi.The girl says bye. The boy starts to cry.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was being dragged by a truck

Knock Knock Who's there? *silence* Silence Who?

What did little jimmy get for Christmas? A box containing the malevolent soul of a 10,000 year-old demon determined to torment his cat.

bum sex lol

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Shoes

Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

whats red and falls from a tree an apple

What do you call someone too young to drink? A minor

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

What do you call someone who takes a toaster into their bath? Adele's number one fan.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...