Why was the lemon not feeling well? Because it had lemon aids.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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A duck walked into a bar. He asked for a drink and the bartender gave him it

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why couldn't she get back up? She blew up

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what did the comedian tell the audience? a joke.

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Why is 6 afriad of 7? because 7 killed 8 with a pistol and is now on a killing spree.

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What does ms colot like to eat? Pants

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why did the truck crash into a tree? cause staplers dont know how to drive

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What's the best thing about twenty six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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what do you call a screwdriver that thinks it'sa hammer? a screwdriver

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? I don't know, I don't have a watch anymore.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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a man walks into a bar and says "help me, my daughter just got hit by a car! the bartender phones the ambulance and the girl survives.

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You are what you eat, so... Can we not talk about this? Cause for me it's recently been sort of sexual. ... How can it be ?.... Ohhhh, dude, that's disgusting...

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What clicks when its out of lead ? A gun Why was the little black boy crying ? He ran out of that grape drank How do you make a dead baby float ? You take your foot of its head How do you know when your life is over ? When you start watching Twilight What is blue and sticky ? Blue Stick What do you get when you mix a dog and a cat ? Shit

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If you analyze this joke closely you' ll realize its not funny.

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How did the man with no arm and no legs get to the store? Well he certainly didn't walk.

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A bear walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be." The bear mauls his face off and kills several other patrons before police show up and fire three rounds in it's face.

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Why did i drink 4 sodas? Because i was thirsty

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Who's a looser and has no friends??? Max!!! His address is 2131 HighHills Narrow...

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Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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Ding dong... Knocking hurts.

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What do you say to jacks mum when your having Sex? Nothing she's dead.

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Why didn't the black man feed his family? They'd eaten about an hour ago.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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